Philosophy is the highest music

So I haven't gotten to practice horn in a few days but it has been crazy around here. Of course I hung out with my boyfriend over the weekend and worked ( I really need to make time for practice on weekeneds though), and today I was with my parents because we finally bought a house :). And as soon as I got home I got to slaving away at my theory homework ( I even forgot to do my laundry) and now it's to late to practice. I fear of waking my neighbors and them complaining. I was supposed to have lessons today.. but of course that got cancelled because he says he has a stomach virus. It's not that I don't believe him, I don't understand why it is so hard to give just one hour a week to me... maybe if he doesn't have time for me he shouldn't have offered the class at the college, don't cha think? I know he's sick but something always comes up! Well I'm trying to get that straightened out and practicing this super hard solo, Adagio and Allegro. It's going alright so far but it just doesn't sound like the recording to me. I'm thinking maybe I'm just playing it to fast of something. But on a more depressing note, I really wish I could practice right now because I feel super stressed and that always helps me feel better, doesn't it you?? I just found out my grade on a test I took today... not so good and I studied my heart out for it. You know, I always try to look at the positive side of things but this has really got me down.I know I have like 4 other tests but I really want to make honor roll again this semester and that is not a good start! That means every other test I have to work twice as hard. Oh, how I wish everything came as easily  to me as music does. I like how even when you think you know it all about music, there's always something more to learn. It's like in high school I thought I knew it all and here I am in college learning about part writing and all that junk. There is a lot that goes into music and you never really realize it. While I know not all music is written by the rules it's pretty cool to see how the great composeres all seemed to write the same way or in similarly ways. Similarly enough that we can study about it and call it "the rules". I just think music is fascinating in so many ways and the fact that people come up with these combinations and things that sound so good and complicated and amazing. I just don't know how they do it. I try to compose things and it comes out sounding like Jungle Bells. I FAIL. But  I really need to start watching less tv and devoting more time to studying. Last week I had the excuse that I was working all the time but this week I have nothing to do and a math test coming up so I really need to get studying because I don't understand any of it... I'm sure there are a lot of people out there that are with me. They say musicians are supposed to be good at math... sure 2 + 2 but give me this logic stuff and algebra and all that and I am lost. The numbers just don't speak to me. Well I guess I should get off here and go to bed.. 6:00 am comes pretty early. Until next time, live with no regrets. (and practice french horn)!